Today begins the first day of this Lenten season and I feel like I have not been blindsided by this day for the first time in many years. It seems to creep up on me and then pass by with me barely realizing it. Each year I always say that I want to grow and I want to really focus on Lent and each year it seems like I fail. This year may be no different, but I hope that is not the case and I feel like I'm already on this journey.
Starting out this month already working on becoming a better me has helped me embark on this journey that much more easily. I have begun the hike up the mountain of betterment and I have already started wearing-in my boots. I have done okay working on not complaining. And I think I have done pretty well keeping my actual complaining words to a minimum. Now, I need to work on my attitude. Something else that has made me more alive and aware of the work involved in this journey is that I have a partner with whom I will go down this road - my husband. We have tried to keep prayer in our lives and we have succeeded many times and failed many times as well, but we have always gone through Lent separately. Last night, we sat down and talked about what we wanted to give up and where we wanted to head - individually, as a couple, and as a family - in this great journey. We didn't just talk about Lent, but the time we have left on this earth, be it minutes or many, many years. We know that if we want to raise our children to love God as much as we desire to then we have to live our faith and live it together. So, this Lent, I will have the man I married at my side, encouraging me to grow, and I will do the same for him. After all, that's what marriage is for :)...
Also, head on down to Relevant Radio's 40 Links for 40 Days for some great meditations and such to help you on your Lenten journey.
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
A Little Beauty before the Ashes
Set me as a seal on your heart,
Set me as a seal on your soul.
As strong as death is love,
Unyielding as the grave,
Nothing will quench its flame,
Nothing will quench its flame.
Kiss me, my love,
That your name be on my lips
You intoxicate my being
With the fragrance of your presence.
How beautiful you are
My darling
Show me your face,
Let me hear your voice.
Sweet as the dew in the early morn,
Like a lily among the thorns.
Set me as a seal on your heart,
Set me as a seal on your soul.
As strong as death is love,
Unyielding as the grave,
Nothing will quench its flame,
Nothing will quench its flame.
I looked for you,
The one my heart loves,
I looked for you, but did not find you.
Searched through the night,
Until I rested in your sight,
Now I will never let you go.
'Cause you have stolen my heart,
My sister, my bride,
Stolen my heart with one glance of your eye.
Your lips so sweet,
Adorned with honey,
My hands, they drip with myrrh.
Set Me as a Seal by Matt Maher
Once you experience authentic love, how can you even glance at the counterfeit?
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Pro-life Is More than Anti-Abortion
I am pro-life. And by pro-life, I do not just mean that I am against abortion. I believe that every human life is sacred - those just conceived, those growing in the womb, those born and growing, those who are adults, and those who are dying.
After listening to a conversation yesterday about family-size, contraception, and "I've been on the Pill all this time that when we're done having children, my husband is getting snipped because it's his turn to do the work," I wept. I had no words to contribute partly because I was scared to be different and partly because I didn't even know where to begin. These women (who are dear friends) know my husband and I are hoping for a large family. They know we use Natural Family Planning to determine if we need to avoid conceiving. But there's so much more that I wish I could say and explain about WHY we don't use artificial birth control and WHY I would never make my husband lose his fertility or take mine away.
Where do I begin? How do I tell someone that I refuse to contracept, not just because the Pope says "no?" How do I explain the Theology of the Body in one small conversation? That our bodies were made to be united as one and that when we vow to love each other through sickness and health, rich and poor, til death do us part, that it is all-encompassing? That when I am united physically with my husband that we are saying to each other, "I am giving you all of me and I am accepting all of you" because that is the true meaning of love?
I embrace my husband's fertility because that is part of his masculinity and his masculinity is what makes him male and separates him from me but also is what God created him to compliment my feminity as well. To take his fertility away is to deny God is in control of our lives. To remove what makes him masculine is to say I do not need him, that I do not value his human dignity.
I embrace my own fertility as well. Not everyone was meant to have a dozen children and I know that. I do not know how to say, "While we desire to have a large family, we are perfectly content with the two God has blessed us with, should we be unable to have any more." Maybe that's all I need to say. I am not against two-children families. What I am against is this blatant attack on women by the lie that we need to only have two children and to go about that, we need to ruin our fertility and take the reins from God, telling Him that we know better than He does. How many babies have these women truly lost/aborted because the Pill did its job?
I will not ruin my body by taking a pill that works against nature. I will not take something that can eliminiate my ability to bear children (even permanently), to be feminine. I will not consume a pill that can give me migraines, prevent me from losing weight, assist me in gaining it, cause breast cancer, and only change the symptoms of a possible problem. I, personally, am against using the pill medically, unless every other option has been exhausted. There's a great place to get more information on helping women with problems that the Pill is commonly prescribed to "help" them. It's called the Pope Paul VI Institute (www.popepaulvi.com). They are filled with doctors who help women get to the root of why they are having problems and work on a solution instead of masking it with a pill that can do so much harm to your body.
I believe my marriage, even with the rocky parts, has been so solid because we have been open to life. We have not taken the reins and we have trusted that God knows best. We do not view children as another stepping stone in marriage and we believe they are truly a gift and not a "right." We do not view the marital embrace begrudgingly, but have come to see the beauty in "becoming one" and that we are renewing our marriage vows each time we take part in this act. We are working with God and that brings such joy to our lives.
What I have said is not even an ounce of what I want to say, but it's a beginning. I'm so afraid of rejection when I know the Truth shall set everyone free! They may not want to hear it and I don't know that I will have the courage to bring it up, but I pray that if God wants me to be a light for Him that I will find the strength to say the words He wants me to say.
After listening to a conversation yesterday about family-size, contraception, and "I've been on the Pill all this time that when we're done having children, my husband is getting snipped because it's his turn to do the work," I wept. I had no words to contribute partly because I was scared to be different and partly because I didn't even know where to begin. These women (who are dear friends) know my husband and I are hoping for a large family. They know we use Natural Family Planning to determine if we need to avoid conceiving. But there's so much more that I wish I could say and explain about WHY we don't use artificial birth control and WHY I would never make my husband lose his fertility or take mine away.
Where do I begin? How do I tell someone that I refuse to contracept, not just because the Pope says "no?" How do I explain the Theology of the Body in one small conversation? That our bodies were made to be united as one and that when we vow to love each other through sickness and health, rich and poor, til death do us part, that it is all-encompassing? That when I am united physically with my husband that we are saying to each other, "I am giving you all of me and I am accepting all of you" because that is the true meaning of love?
I embrace my husband's fertility because that is part of his masculinity and his masculinity is what makes him male and separates him from me but also is what God created him to compliment my feminity as well. To take his fertility away is to deny God is in control of our lives. To remove what makes him masculine is to say I do not need him, that I do not value his human dignity.
I embrace my own fertility as well. Not everyone was meant to have a dozen children and I know that. I do not know how to say, "While we desire to have a large family, we are perfectly content with the two God has blessed us with, should we be unable to have any more." Maybe that's all I need to say. I am not against two-children families. What I am against is this blatant attack on women by the lie that we need to only have two children and to go about that, we need to ruin our fertility and take the reins from God, telling Him that we know better than He does. How many babies have these women truly lost/aborted because the Pill did its job?
I will not ruin my body by taking a pill that works against nature. I will not take something that can eliminiate my ability to bear children (even permanently), to be feminine. I will not consume a pill that can give me migraines, prevent me from losing weight, assist me in gaining it, cause breast cancer, and only change the symptoms of a possible problem. I, personally, am against using the pill medically, unless every other option has been exhausted. There's a great place to get more information on helping women with problems that the Pill is commonly prescribed to "help" them. It's called the Pope Paul VI Institute (www.popepaulvi.com). They are filled with doctors who help women get to the root of why they are having problems and work on a solution instead of masking it with a pill that can do so much harm to your body.
I believe my marriage, even with the rocky parts, has been so solid because we have been open to life. We have not taken the reins and we have trusted that God knows best. We do not view children as another stepping stone in marriage and we believe they are truly a gift and not a "right." We do not view the marital embrace begrudgingly, but have come to see the beauty in "becoming one" and that we are renewing our marriage vows each time we take part in this act. We are working with God and that brings such joy to our lives.
What I have said is not even an ounce of what I want to say, but it's a beginning. I'm so afraid of rejection when I know the Truth shall set everyone free! They may not want to hear it and I don't know that I will have the courage to bring it up, but I pray that if God wants me to be a light for Him that I will find the strength to say the words He wants me to say.
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